Experts in the dating field all agree on one thing: dating is a game of numbers. The more you try the higher your chances of success. But there are important dating advice most men ignore that stand in the way of getting it right time after time.
In dating, like most ventures in life, psychology is important. One important aspect of this psychology is that success breeds confidence. While failure shatters us.
But as you would see later, handling both sides of success/failure divide would go a long way in determining how successful your attempts are in dating.
As men, due mostly to cultural imperatives, the onus lies on us to make dating a success most of the time. Of course, ladies too have a role to play in making a date happen.
So what are the most important dating advice most men ignore? Stay with me as I break it down for you.
Important Dating advice Most Men Ignore
Take care of number one first
This is one important dating advice most men ignore. Before thinking of dating as an adult, take time out to look at yourself first. The obvious and simple question here is, are you ready?
Being ready means a lot. And it is not just a mental attitude or about attaining a particular age in your life. Apart from the mental attitude, taking care of ‘number one’ involves proper grooming of yourself.
For instance, do you have nice clothes and shoes? Do you know how to speak properly with ladies without sounding insulting? Are open to learning new things to make yourself a better person.
What all these means is this: are you investing enough tender loving care on yourself? Because if you don’t love yourself enough, you would find it hard in the dating terrain.
You need enough money
Listen, if you are still hooked on all those childhood love stories where money is hardly ever mentioned, then this advice is for you. Dating costs money.
Nobody is saying you must empty your bank account to take a girl out. And definitely, nobody is saying you have to spend a fortune each time you take her out.
Still, it costs money to do some basic stuff. Dinners in decent restaurants cost money except you or your family own the place. Going to movies or outings to other places would cost your money in tickets, taxi fares, or buying fuel if you have your own car.
Do you want to talk about the treats needed for a successful date? Treats like gifts for special occasions or just gifts and stuff as a surprise for her? You need money to do all these. So if you are not the heir to a vast fortune, you better plan your finances to include cash for dating.
Point is, you don’t want to go broke while dating. At the same time, you don’t want to humiliate yourself because of inadequate funds. The best way to go about this is to save money for dating.
Fear of rejection is the beginning of failure
The third important dating advice most men ignore is not to fear being rejected. This fear of rejection freezes most men in their tracks, and they end up doing nothing.
Veterans of dating with the benefit of hindsight would confidently tell you that fear is overrated. It is simply a case of blowing everything out of proportion, creating a storm in a teacup.
Remember, I earlier said dating is a game of numbers. The more you do it, the higher your chances of success and the better you get. Rejection comes with the turf.
The only men who have never faced rejection are those who never tried it. Ask them how it turned out for them. It is either they never got the date they desired or never even dated before.
Again, even the best of us had been rejected at one time or the other. Learn never to take it personally. Never allow rejection affect your confidence and bring you down.
Just move on to the next girl that meets the qualities you desire in a woman. A corollary to fear of rejection is settling for any girl that comes along because you are tired of being single after so many rejections.
Again, that is a wrong attitude to adopt. Never, ever rush to grab the nearest girl as a rebound or as a means to mask the hurt from your last rejection. Affairs like this hardly end up right. And besides, it is not fair to the innocent girl that is likely to suffer because of your insecurities.
Be open-minded and flexible
Being open-minded and flexible can get you a long way with the ladies. Unfortunately, this is one important dating advice most men ignore.
You see, going on a date with somebody new is mostly a journey of discovery. It is a chance for you to discover what makes her tick. A chance to see if her general views on life fits with yours.
So if you go on a date with fixed, preconceived ideas, you’d really make a disagreeable date.
She would find you a hard person to open up to. And how would you be able to make an informed judgment about your date if she doesn’t open up to you?
A big hole inflexible men always fall into is to think the girl refused to open up to them because she is a shy person. The girl could be shy for real. But perhaps, it was mostly your attitude that made her clamp up.
With a flexible and open mind, you would learn a lot from the ladies I assure you. And what you learn would only make you a better person. Most of the time at least.
So, what do you think of these important dating advice most men ignore? Do you also ignore these pieces of advice? How has your experience(s) been? We would love to hear your views in the comment section.