I know how frustrating it can be to date a shy guy. And no matter what you do to make the shy guy outgoing, it always ends in failure. Or a temporary success is always just that. Temporary.
Your almost perfect man crawls back into his shell and puts up bigger and stronger defenses around himself. As if he is telling you loudly to love him only from a distance.
I am a shy guy by nature. But for some spurious reasons I can’t put my finger on, I try to hide that fact from the ladies. Perhaps, it is a fear of being taken advantage of.
Since I have being there and done that, I believe I know the magic formula to making a shy guy outgoing. So ladies, take it from a closet shy guy, don’t give up in your attempts to make that lovely man your partner just because you can’t get past the walls he’d built around himself
Don’t Rush into the Romantic Side of Things
If you try that, you can kiss your dreams of hooking up good bye. It is advisable to bring him out of his shell gradually with patience.
A shy guy can’t be shy all the time. Notice the way he talks with his friends. He is as loud as the next dude. That is because he is with people he trusts.
So that should be your first line of attack. Talk to him as a friend. But don’t overdo it or you’d fall into that frustrating friend zone. In which case, you have another problem to overcome.
Be Inquisitive Without been Intrusive
The reason he is tagged shy is because he clamps up in front of you. To loosen his tongue, ask him very simple questions like how his day was. Don’t mind his monosyllabic answers. That is his nature.
And to get him to relax in front of you, keep talking to him about things that happened to you. Both the little things and the big things. That’s your way of showing him he can trust you with his secrets.
Never Forget Stuff he Told You
That is one of the surest ways of making your shy guy outgoing. Letting him know you remember things he told you in his own quiet way can be boost his confidence.
Remembering these small things makes him realize you think he is an important person. And besides, for your sake, remembering ensures you never trip up in your mission to make this wonderful shy guy outgoing.
Always Treat Your Conversations like a Top Secret
It is always natural to rush to your besties and tell them about your time with him. You can do that, but with the caveat that your friends don’t repeat want you told them.
So it’s best to tell only close and trusted friends. Better still, keep the important stuff to yourself.
Thing is, gist between friends has a way of growing and it might get back to him in a form that would hurt his fragile confidence.
When that happens because of your indiscretion, kiss bye to all your hard work. One thing shy guys hate the most is having their private life discussed publicly.
Plan Dates for Both of You
Don’t leave the planning of dates to him. It would take him forever to get his confidence and begin to arrange one. Because of his nature, it might also take him a long time to finally settle on a best day and place.
Shy guys are very sensitive about making a mess of things. So they tend to over-plan in bid to get the perfect date. So it’s best you take the initiative and plan the dates for both of you.
Concerts, cinemas and places where he won’t have to talk much are the best places to go as you embark on your mission of making your shy guy outgoing like the best of them.
Give Him all Your Attention
So now the shy guy is talking to you the way you wanted all along? Okay, you don’t go and spoil everything by seeming distracted when you guys are together and he is talking.
Show him you are completely with him by looking at him when he is talking to you. Never allow anything, especially your smartphone, to distract you.
Ease Him Gradually into the Family and Friends Scene
You’ve now made the shy guy outgoing with you. Don’t make the mistake of thinking he would be that way with your friends and family.
Chances are, he would never be free with them. So when you take him to visit your family or friends, do remember to warn them beforehand that he is shy person. Most people understand so they’ll do their best not to make him uncomfortable.
I know, doing all that just to make one shy guy outgoing would seem like a lot of work. Here is the thing; it is entirely possible that in the shy guy, you’ve found the perfect man for yourself. In which case, no sacrifice is too small to make him yours permanently. Right?
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