I would never tire of saying it that the zero contact rule, also known as the no contact rule, is the best way to get over an ex. Staying in contact with an ex you once loved very much is tempting to say the least.
There are many reasons why you feel still being in contact is the way to go. The classic one is, ‘We can still be friends even if we are not dating anymore.’ That is easy to say. And easier to do if one is not ready to move on.
What is never said out loud is that staying in touch comes with a lot of problems. Your love life can be in limbo while you are still in contact with your ex. Because, at the back of your mind, there is this niggling feeling that things can still be resolved.
Getting back with an ex does happens from time to time. But if the separation was bitter, or the reasons for the break up were very compelling, not following the zero contact rule is one way of hampering your progress in life.
Seriously, it is a bad idea to remain friends with your ex if you plan is to move on. Don’t for one moment think you can only be friends with your ex and pull it off successfully. It rarely ever works.
These are cogent reasons why the zero contact strategy is the best way to handle the ex situation
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You need to move on
Ignoring the zero contact rule would stop you from moving on. It is the memories of the good times you had together that would really mess you up.
It is almost impossible not to call your next without thinking of the fun you had. That is a short step away from thinking it is possible to recreate that life again.
So how can you move on if you are still stuck in reliving the good times with your ex with the constant contact through phone calls or text messages?
It would be difficult to love somebody else
Finding someone else is the crux of the matter in moving on. You need to move on so you can have a fair shot at falling in love again.
To put it another way, moving on also ensures your ex has a chance of building another life for themselves without you as the focus.
That is what happens when you ignore the zero contact strategy. You make your life miserable in the short run. And ultimately, the whole ‘idea‘ of your ex can get into your head and unbalance you emotionally.
Your Relationship Status Becomes Vague
When you and your ex ignore the zero contact rule, your relationship status becomes undefined. You won’t know if you are in a relationship or not.
I have seen this happen time and time again. Two exes coming back in an attempt to start over, only to break up again after the fire has died down.
If the reason you two broke up in the first place is still there, the likelihood you’d break up again is almost 100%. Repairing the pieces of a broken relationship requires more than the ideal idea of wanting to reconnect with an ex.
So in other not to be part of the energy-sapping and emotionally-draining ‘on today, off tomorrow relationship,’ the zero contact rule is the best option for exes wishing to get clarity in their lives.
The Frustrations are not worth it
It is painful seeing somebody you covert secretly having it off with somebody else. That is what happens when you stay in contact with your ex.
Sooner than letter, you come face to face with the ex looking happy with a new partner. Where does that leave you? I guess you had the faint hope you guys would build something better; using the mistakes of the past as a spring board.
Unfortunately for you, your ex did not get the memo. Your ex is living the life with a new flame. Your best course of action is to take a mighty leap back and implement the zero contact rule immediately.
If you don’t, the frustrations can lead you into a place you don’t want to be I promise.
You are Vulnerable without the Zero Contact Rule
This is all about the aggregations of the intimacy you once had. You might think you are strong enough to handle the situation. Most often than not, you are vulnerable to you ex in more ways than you know.
The touch of your ex can bring back a rush of good memories.
The smile can rekindle so many pleasant times together.
Even the smell can do things to you to break down your resolve not be involved with them again.
So the question to ask yourself is this: Why do you want to hurt yourself so much? What are you going to lose if you follow the zero contact rule?
Following the zero contact rule can be a test of will power. Or it can be a way to train your mind on how to handle temptations. You can then reap the benefits in other aspects of your life.
We would love to hear your comments on how you feel about the zero contact rule. And if you liked what you just read, please share it on Twitter or Facebook. Cheers.
