I think a short background to this piece is apt. A guide on what to do if your girlfriend is crying and freaking out seemed like a logical progression of the benefits of crying especially for women.
This thing about tears and crying all started when I stirred the hornets nest with a sincere appeal for men to stop disgracing our sex by crying publicly.
So now I have to address the issue of what to do if your significant other is crying and freaking out.
For dudes all over the world, a crying girlfriend is something to avoid. Though I have to admit that seeing a girlfriend crying and freaking out can be a good thing for the man’s ego.
How do I mean? Come on, a helplessly crying female brings out the real man in us. It makes us feel strong and protective. At least, in situations where we are not the reason she is crying.
At this point I must say I am very qualified to give advice to you guys on how to handle a girlfriend who is crying and freaking out. My qualification is coupled tightly to my experiences.
And you what they say about experience being the best teacher? Well I’d had tons of very good teachers.
‘Don’ts’ to Dealing with a Crying and Freaking Out Girlfriend
First of, these are the things you must not do if your girlfriend is crying and freaking out.
1. You should never freak out and get emotional too. Remember that. You are here to handle a situation, so you need your head to be clear and be in the right place.
2. It is a mistake telling her to calm down especially if the cause of her tears are directly linked to your bad behavior. You see, crying is just her saying unsavoury things about you without using words.
You should thank God for that. It is likely you might never recover if you knew what those tears are really saying about you.
3. Don’t do or say anything that might make her feel worse. If you don’t know the appropriate words to use, keep mute and arrange your facial features in a way that befits the occasion.
All I am saying is, just stay quiet, with a sad and concerned look on your face.
4. Unless she specifically asked for it, don’t try to give her advice.
5. Most importantly, if you are going to put the nice guy hat on, don’t overdo it with too much apologies.
‘Dos’ to Dealing with a Crying and Freaking Out Girlfriend
The things you should do are basically the opposite of the things you shouldn’t do.
1. Remain calm and appear to be unruffled even if your emotions are doing a roller coaster inside of you. Appearing calm lets her know she can depend on you all the time anytime she is crying and freaking out.
2. If the crying comes with accusations, don’t jump into the ring and argue it out with logic.
This is one of the times you’d just have to lose the argument. Accept whatever she says with a stoicism befitting a saint.
3. Sometimes, the reason she is crying and freaking out might be unrelated to you. It could be something related to how a friend treated her badly or she feels betrayed by her family.
Expect that her rage or anger might inexplicably become directed at you. Try and remain calm in the face of that unfair assault.
Remember, your main job as the man is to guide her through this emotionally troubling phase of her day. And the best way to do it is to be there for her without making the situation worse.
4. If she allows it, put your arms around her and just hold her without saying anything.
This simple guide can also apply to an emotionally distraught dude.
If you have a friend that is in the ‘real men cry‘ school of thought, and for some reason he is crying in front of you, no matter how your instincts are pushing you to berate him for behaving like a woman, just remain calm.
And treat the shameless dude the way you would treat a lady who is crying and freaking out in front of you. Of course, without putting your arms around him.
That (putting your arms around him) would be awkward, don’t you think so? A pat on the back is good enough for a man you are trying to console.
The thing about relationship and advising people about relationship is that there must be a lot of improvisation because every situation is somehow unique. So if you have no idea how to alter laid down guides like this one to fit your unique situation, you would be a in lot of trouble.
There, that is the veteran guide from me on how to handle a crying and freaking out girlfriend or even dude in rare cases.
If you have any issues with my guide and feel strongly about them, please let us know about them in the comments box below.