Ask any lady, they all have a tale or two about what irked them most about a first date. For ladies, first date turn offs can be anything. Generally, though, it is a symptom of bad behavior or lack of self-awareness on the part of the man.
Sometimes, first date turn offs exhibited by dudes could just be down to nervousness. Guys should be cut some slack here. It is not every dude that can give a slick performance worthy of James Bond character. Life is a different ball game from the make-believe world of movies.
That said, some of the annoying things men do can be avoided with a little effort. Most times, these irritating habits could be toned down or completely eliminated with just a little effort.
Spare a thought for dudes with an obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). They can’t help what they do as much as you can’t help blinking. In cases like this, the guy should flat out inform the lady about his OCD.
Hopefully, she would be understanding enough to ignore these OCD quirks and judge the brother on his merits.
Here are some of the worst first date turn offs the ladies are just tired of dealing with.
Common first date turn offs to avoid
1. Texting or chatting
Some men actually think showing a girl how busy they are is cool. They go ahead and show it by texting or chatting with friends while at the table. This is bad and it shows a lack of respect for your date.
Trying to have a pleasant date while a partner intermittently disrupts it to chat or text is the definition of irritating. It is also down right frustrating. Keep the phone at home or switch it off.
2. Posting on Facebook and other social forums
Real men think guys who invest too much time on social media are disgusting. What the ladies think might be way off the ‘disgust scale.’
And taking this habit to a first date is totally maddening. There is no need to take a picture of your date and share with your friends online. At the same time, on this first date, ladies are not interested in seeing all the interesting things your friends get up to online.
Keep that info for another day. Just concentrate giving her a good time without involving your smartphone.
3. Asking intimate questions
Sometimes, a guy would want to show how open he is by talking about everything. It is okay to be open. In fact, it is an admirable trait to have.
But asking her about her sexual proclivities or talking about yours is a big turnoff. It is the first date for God sakes! There are so many things to talk about without going there.
Leave that info for some other time when the girl is comfortable with you.
4. Talking about your ex
Talking about your ex is one of the biggest first date turn offs out there. It shows bad form if you have to bring up an ex so soon into a new affair.
Are you trying to set a marker for your date? Are you laying out the standards you expect from her?
No matter your intention, talking about an ex puts unnecessary pressure on her. If she asks, keep the answer short. The full story of that adventure should come out at a later time.
5. Busy hands
Some guys feel it is a good to show how confident they are on a first date. They get all touchy with their hands. Some even try to snake their hands up the girl’s skirt under the table.
Well, you sure are getting too touchy for a first date. There are several ways a girl might sure her displeasure. Slapping off your nosey hands is not even the worst.
6. Not focused on her
This is your first date. The situation demands your attention is completely on her. Don’t allow your curiosity supplant her from your focus.
To be specific, don’t look at other girls passing by. Don’t let your shifty eyes linger on the pretty waitress. And most important, no looking at the well-rounded butts of other ladies.
You get the gist?
7. Making fun of her
You have heard several times that getting a girl to laugh is a good first date move. If you can be funny, great! But don’t just do it at her expense okay.
She doesn’t know you enough to think you mean nothing serious about it. She might laugh not to make you feel awkward. But inside, she is seething with annoyance.
Expect her to avoid you in future.
8. Bad table manners
A good advice to follow for a first date is to relax and be yourself. But if being yourself includes poor table manners, then you must re-evaluate that advice.
Girls hate it when you eat noisily or insist on talking with food in your mouth. It is unattractive at the best of times. And for a first date, it is simply the pits.
9. Talk too much
Nervousness can make you prattle non-stop. At the same time, you could be trying to avoid those silences in conversation that can be awkward especially on a first date.
Whatever is going on with you, try as much as possible to let her have her say. But don’t overdo the ‘letting-her-have-her-say’ thing though. Too much silence on your part can be uncomfortable to her too.
Find a middle ground that works very well for both of you.
10. Don’t get drunk
Nobody likes a partner getting drunk on a first date. And it is even more shameful if the man can’t hold his drink like a man.
Nobody is stopping you from drinking. Actually, a drink or two is good as it helps to kill those butterflies in your stomach to make you relax.
But you should know your limit. It is a sign of irresponsibility to get drunk and embarrass the poor girl. Come on, this is your first date, you should be at the top of your game.
So, which of these first date turn offs are you guilty of? Can you think of any more habits to avoid on a first date because it annoys the hell out of the ladies? Feel free to vent your thoughts in the comments section below.