I often hear people say “he loves me, he loves me not!” How do you really determine if he truly loves you? What yardstick do you use in measuring such?
We all seem to know what love is and if asked, people will come up with their own definition of what they consider love to be.
One of the key reasons couples go into relationships is because they love each other and while this is one strong motivating factor, have you ever wondered what love is not?
So many people are in relationships today but they do not know if the love that exists is real or not. It is therefore necessary to know those things that characterize what love is not.
Love is not selfish:
If you say you love your partner then you should be willing to share all you have with him or her.
If you keep all you have to yourself then what sort of love is that? If you are selfish, all you will be concerned about is yourself and not your partner and this is not what love is.
True love always puts the other person before him or herself. Do you practice this?
It is not seasonal:
I used to wonder why some people would say they used to love their partner but now they do not. Love is not seasonal and should not be a temporary feeling.
If you really love your partner, you should do so having it in mind that your love ought to be unconditional and should be able to stand the test of time.
If you are in a relationship with the sole aim of breaking up after sometime then you do not have true love for your partner.
Love is not one sided:
A lot of people suffer in their relationships because only one party seems to be enjoying the benefits of that relationship.
A good relationship should not be parasitic and both of you should equally enjoy it. If all you do in your relationship is to receive without giving then that relationship is one sided.
It is not fake:
Love should not be seen as being fake and so if your partner portrays actions that depict this then that is not what love is.
Love should be genuine and should come from the heart but if it is fake, it would be termed as just lip service.
If your partner does things without meaning it or if he or she pretends to you then such a love is unreal.
Love is not distant:
How many of you can say you are in love with your partner and still stay distant from him or her? True love never grows apart but does all it can to remain close to its lover.
If you love your partner, you will always want to be around him or her and circumstances would not be able to tear you apart.
If you notice that your partner keeps him or herself away from you and makes excuses while doing this then that is not what love should be.
Love is not wicked:
Love is one of the wonderful feelings anyone can experience although it could be painful at times but it should not get to the point where it leaves you so heartbroken and shattered.
I do not believe anyone who says he or she loves their partner would deliberately want to harm them. If this happens then it is mere wickedness.
Some ladies remain in relationships even though they get beaten up all the time for the sake of love. This is simply dehumanization and not what love is.
Love ought to be pure, sweet, enjoyable and attractive and so if you do not feel all of these in your relationship then you have clearly mis understood what love really is.
I believe the points above have explained to you better on what love is not.