If You Judge People, You Won’t Have Time To Love
Sometimes, you find it somehow difficult to get along with some certain people due to your perception about them or due to your experiences with them. It is not to say you hate them but you seem not to have that enough patient to love simply because you’re always switch-off whenever you have contact with these certain people.
You’re not left alone, everyone is guilty of this but it is changeable and every one of us will love it, provided we refuse to judge them and try to see the other side of them knowing fully well that, they can’t completely be a bad person.
I had always having this challenge with a friend of mine before now, every time we met, he has always complained about his father not supporting him enough to achieve his dream in life especially after he has been through with the Secondary School. He wanted to further his education at that time but there’s no enough financial power from the family to cater for the program he wanted to enrol for.
And again he’s a person that never has the patient to follow through whatever he desire to achieve. Once he wanted to do something and he couldn’t get it done as at when he wants it, he easily gave up about it and looking for the next thing to do.
These two aspects of his life are what I always see whenever we come together and I had always used them to judge him.
But one day, I met another group of friends who knew him too very well, though they also thought my friend is complicated, but he is just an amazing person beyond this two difficulties he has not allow to get out of his way. According to these friends, he’s just a loving father and very dedicated to his family affair, besides this, he’s also a fun person to go out with. But I never recall just one moment that I had with him that was interesting.
I come to realized that, I have been judging him base on my perception about him and that does not give me enough time to really understand him and love him more.
About two days later, I came across one of Mother Teresa’s quote; she said “If you judge people, you have no time to love them.” Although I was trying to help him to get those challenges out of his life but I realized that my judgement about him had really interfered with what I could have enjoyed about his company. If I had not had such judgement about him, I could have really enjoyed his relationship and have fun just like the other friends had with him.
The reality of this is that, the way we judge people, actually interfere with our relationship with them. The people might be doing their best but since we consider it not good enough, we form an opinion about them and this makes it really had to love such people more.
It is an easier route to judge people but it more difficult and challenging to loving them. Maybe that’s why lots of us always look for the easier path instead of the more challenging one.
In your relationship with your partner, you should rather celebrate your partner’s magnificence rather that his or her failings. Doing this, will help you to love more and not allowing you more time to start judging him or her base on what you perceive not good enough for him or her.
Don’t get me wrong here; I’m never of the opinion that you should ignore the truth about your feelings towards your partner or friends. No, but what I want you to understand is that, instead of you seeing how your partner or friend behaving in a certain situation which you’re not too comfortable with, you should allow yourself to see the whole of him or her.
What you’ll benefit from seeing the whole of your friends or partner as the case may be, is that, you’ll find there’s so much greater thing in them that you can’t possibly notice when you’re being judgmental about them. The less judgemental you are about your friends, the more loving you’ll become and you’ll be able to enjoy the true essence of their life.
There’s nothing can be more important about us human than sharing the warmth and love that radiates in our heart.
Have you ever felt this way before about someone just as I had done in the past? I’ll be more than happy if you can as well share your experience with us. And if you have any contribution, comment or suggestions, please make use of the comment form below to share your view with us. The social networking icons are there too if you want to share this article so that your other friends too, can read what you’ve just read and you might just be helping someone out there.