Are you and your baby one of those on again off again couples? Must be hard, huh? And you seriously thought that this was going to be the case too this time. But isn’t “this time” taking a bit too long? Is your break-up anxiety getting the best of you?
When you’re in an on again off again kind of relationship, break-ups start to feel shallow – well, until it’s not (read more). You think that you’re both just going through the same phase again where one feels a little too tired of drama and needs a break. You don’t worry too much because it’s all going to be over soon anyway. You’ll beep each other up, say your apologies, and be all love struck again.
The only problem is that your partner doesn’t get the drill this time. There seems to be no phone call, no text; there’s literally no sign of a lonely soul anywhere. Uh-oh. This seems alarming, right? Uh-oh. This seems totally abnormal, isn’t it?
Well, you know what? People get tired too. If you just keep on getting caught up in the same fiasco over and over, one of you will eventually give up and find your relationship hopeless. One of you will start thinking in the long term and how a pain it would be to have to deal with such relationship drama time and time again. Add the fact that social media is making people idealize relationships more and more these days. Of course, your boyfriend is going to get tired of the immature tantrums and the baseless cheating accusations. Of course, your girlfriend is going to get tired of the all work no time for dates crap.
People have limits. And if you keep pushing buttons you shouldn’t even be pushing in the first place, you are sure going to get it. Read more about this here: https://www.femalefirst.co.uk/relationships/ways-you-push-your-partners-buttons-and-what-you-can-do-to-fix-it-894901.html.
And you know what the biggest no-no of all is? It’s faking a break-up.
The Root Cause Of Almost Every Petty Break-Up
“I’m so tired of this relationship. Let’s break-up.” But you don’t really want to break up, you just want some attention.
“Oh yeah? If he’s so cool why don’t you date him then? Let’s just break up.” But really, you just want some validation and have her tell you that you’re the coolest person in the planet.
Petty break-ups like this or the very fact that you keep “teasing” a break-up when you don‘t really want it is very unhealthy for relationships. You’ll be surprised when one day, your partner really does get tired of the same old crap and leaves you at random. Many couples battle real issues and end up after doing everything they can to save the relationship. Then, there’s you – being wishy-washy, thinking that you have all the right to be spoiled.
Let me tell you exactly how to get your ex back. Well, if you want to get your ex back – and for good this time – you have to make sure that you never repeat the same pattern (that is, if you are doing it). It’s not good to play with someone’s feelings. It’s terribly unhealthy to challenge your partner’s love for you. If you don’t trust each other in that aspect, then how can you even call yourselves “in-love”? Never try to fake a break-up just to validate your position in someone’s life. Do not try to power play in the relationship. If you need attention, just say it upright. If you need validation, then ask nicely but directly. Don’t dilly-dally about it.
Also, if the cause of your break-up is much more serious than this (aka “an actual problem), be proactive about your decision to rekindle your relationship. Instead on going full-on destructive mode, better yourself. Most of the time, your partner simply wants to see you actually make an effort to change. Show them your utmost sincerity; your willingness to correct your wrongs. Seriously, if you keep doing what it is your partner hated because “you’re now broken up anyway,” you’re further reducing your chances of ever getting back with him or her.
Use this time to reflect on your actions. And when you’re ready, try to ask your ex out again. This time, do it with more love, dedication, and sincerity.