Love stories have always been a big seller. However, it’s not the case for millennials. Now it’s a tough time of speed dating and digital obsession. As a result, 45% of adults in the U.S. are unmarried or divorced at the moment.
The number of single people is increasing every year. Personal relationships are important because high social support helps you to deal with stress and keeps you healthy. Yet still, so many single adults are not capable of having a relationship.
Millennials aren’t commitment-phobic in the majority. The new generation can observe the cultural phenomenon of self-absorption. An individual tends to focus on personal goals, such as education, career and own pleasure.
Substitutes for intimacy
Avoiding the relationships became possible thanks to the abundance of substitutes for intimacy on the market. It helps single adults to get what they need as quickly as possible. So they don’t have to start another disappointing relationship.
Social media obsession
An average person spends 116 minutes a day on social media. Recall how many messages you’ve got only today. Indeed, social media helps people to feel less lonely. When you share personal information and even get support from people online, you build an emotional connection.
It’s easier to communicate with people via chatting because you can take your time and think about what to write. You can hide your true feelings or intentions, and pretend to be someone else. It’s a world where you can build your image from the very beginning, and it will look just the way you want. Introverts and people with low self-esteem wish to keep their relationships online. And it’s not a problem in the time of the Internet.
Sex toys
Sex toys have a completely different level at the moment. It is considered to be more than a simple subject that you can use to satisfy yourself sexually.
Single people are looking not only for a sexual relationship but also for emotional intimacy.
In the last 50 years, the technology advanced so much that sex dolls look like real women. Users are usually emotionally attached to their silicone girlfriends. Moreover, some men turn to a romantic relationship with realistic sex dolls. So, their “substitutes” have names and even get different presents from time to time. The movie called Her isn’t science-fiction in our days. Entirely possible, it is a future pattern for men who don’t feel comfortable around real women.
Usually, this substitute is used by men who had a few broken relationships in the past.
Porn videos
Masturbation is pretty common for people who are not in the relationship at the moment. Watching porn videos turns people on and helps them to release their sexual tension.
There is also porn addiction that is difficult to overcome. People who are addicted to pornography are usually emotionally disconnected from others. They are not motivated to look for the relationship because they are satisfied sexually.
Millennials can also avoid the relationships subconsciously. Some unresolved psychological issues prevent them from commitment. It can be a traumatic experience, low self-esteem or emotional dysfunction. In all these cases the treatment should be provided by trained therapists.
Traumatic experience
Sometimes people experience physical, sexual or verbal abuse. And they are not always able to resolve it by themselves. Such issues can cause a long-lasting effect. So, some people tend to withdraw from others and avoid any relationships. They feel vulnerable. Indeed, no one can say what’s happening in one man’s head.
Overcoming the pain is possible. To regain the sense of emotional balance, the person with traumatic experience needs to get professional help and work on this problem.
Low self-esteem
It applies to people who think that they are not good enough to be in the relationship.
People who have low self-esteem easily get jealous in the relationship and refuse to trust. Also, they tend to spend all of their free time with their partners. The reason for it is that they can feel loved only this way.
In the end, it usually raises the conflict in the couple and leads to the break-up. It will happen all over again if the person doesn’t solve this problem.
Emotional dysfunction
1 in 25 adults in the United States has a mental illness. We are speaking about 9.8 million at this point. Emotional dysfunction includes depression and anxiety. It also makes people easily frustrated with small matters. No wonder, they avoid building relationships with others. It just cannot work without medical treatment.
Now you know that there are certain substitutes and psychological issues that prevent people from commitment. If you have been avoiding the relationship for too long but want to change the situation, you need to understand yourself, emotionally and sexually. Answer why you are sabotaging your relationship at this point and have a fresh start!
