Parenting can be stressful at times. With so many demands on your time and energy, it’s easy to become overwhelmed or lose your cool. However, staying calm benefits both you and your child. When you model a peaceful presence, your child learns to self-soothe and regulate their emotions. Here are ten practical tips to help you keep your calm as a parent.
1. Take Time for Yourself
It’s vital to prioritise self-care, even amidst the busyness of parenting. Make time each day to engage in an activity you enjoy, whether reading, exercising, or connecting with friends. Taking breaks restores your patience and energy levels. Even 10-15 minutes to yourself makes a big difference.
2. Limit Multitasking
Trying to juggle too many tasks at once is a recipe for stress. Instead of multitasking, focus on one thing at a time. For example, when playing with your child, avoid checking your phone simultaneously. Single-tasking reduces anxiety and improves your concentration.
3. Practise Deep Breathing
Deep breathing instantly engages the parasympathetic nervous system, signalling your body to relax. Inhale slowly through your nose, hold briefly, and exhale deeply through your mouth. Repeat for a few minutes whenever you notice tension building. This simple tool calms the mind and body.
4. Maintain Perspective
When frustrations mount, maintain perspective. Remember, your child is learning and growing, and this phase won’t last forever. Seek understanding by asking yourself, “Why is my child acting this way?” Viewing their behaviour compassionately makes it easier to respond calmly.
5. Let Go of Perfectionism
Holding yourself to impossibly high standards adds unnecessary pressure. Parenting is messy; mistakes happen. Strive to be “good enough” as a parent, not perfect. Offer yourself grace, do your best, and let the small stuff go.
6. Utilise Your Support Network
Don’t hesitate to ask others for help. For example, if you’re fostering in the UK, you could contact your fostering agency, such as Foster Care Associates Scotland, for support. Share your struggles openly so friends, family and loved ones can encourage you or give you a break. It takes a village to raise a child.
7. Practise Mindfulness
Mindfulness teaches present-moment awareness. When you notice irritation creeping in, pause and pay attention to your senses. Notice your breath, bodily sensations, sights, and sounds without judgment. This resets your mind, allowing you to respond thoughtfully vs. reactively.
8. Get Physical Activity
Blow off steam with exercise; even light movement like stretching helps. Physical activity decreases stress hormones and boosts feel-good endorphins. Take your child on a walk around the neighbourhood. Play tag in the garden, or do yoga stretches together before bedtime.
9. Adjust Your Expectations
Look objectively at the developmental stage of your child and adjust expectations accordingly. Expecting too much too soon will leave you both frustrated. Celebrate the skills your child does have. As their abilities grow, you can gradually introduce new challenges.
10. Focus on Positives
Make a daily habit of noticing your child’s strengths vs. just correcting them. Verbalise the positives you observe like, “You worked so hard to build that tower!” This builds their confidence and reinforces good behaviour. Starting the day on a positive note sets you both up for success.
Making calm choices, despite the stresses of parenting, allows you to be your best self for your child. With daily self-care, proper support, and a little patience, maintaining inner peace is possible.
