6 Signs You’re Not Ready to Move Beyond Dating
Hey there! So…things getting serious? Beginning to wonder what comes next? Never fear, it’s an internal debate we all have at one point or another in a long-term relationship. After all, “dating” is a very un-serious word, and after a few months, it’s hard not to start looking toward the future.
It’s time to figure out if you’re ready to take those next steps. Whether you’re thinking of taking a knee, moving in, or maybe just introducing them to your parents, you need to know if they’re worth the new commitment. Check through; if they raise any of these red flags, you may want to stay right where you are for a little while longer.
1. You’ve Only Been Dating for a Week
Those early honeymoon days can get anyone spun up and more than a little off-kilter. I get it: you’ve been together five days and you’re already certain your souls have physically meshed – we’ve all been there.
But once you emerge from that haze of hormones and first impressions, you might find that they’re not quite the picture of masculine/feminine perfection you thought they were. And guess what? It’s really awful to come to that realization after you’ve signed a joint lease. So slow down, cowboy. If they’re worth spending your life with, a two-month long reality check isn’t much of a sacrifice.
2. You’re Not Self Sufficient
Ah, the classic hamstring of young love. You’re a teenager, you’re dopey for someone, you want to live together, and neither of you has a job.
Stop being stupid.
Look, relationships at their best are a pairing of two functional, happy, complete people. If that doesn’t describe you, then you’ve got no business rushing into a serious commitment. For the sake of you and your significant other, prioritize yourself. Hit education, career, and life goals before you start aiming for relationship goals.
3. You Hate Their Friends
Pretty self-explanatory. Your significant other will have friends (I’d imagine), and they will spend time with those friends. And if you can’t stand to be around them when they spend time with those friends, you’re in for a rough relationship road.
Spending the majority of your life with someone means that you’ll regularly come into contact with the people they care about. Forcing someone to split their time between friends and you can place a horrific amount of pressure on them, and put fatal stress on your relationship.
4. Trust Problems
Most hurdles can be overcome in a close enough relationship. And honestly, trust issues can be as well, I just tend to be a little leery about the impact they can have on progressing relationships. It’s a little counter intuitive, but if you’re obsessively terrified your SO is secretly watching webcams, proximity won’t fix that.
Instead, it’ll make it worse. Living together can increase stress of just about every type, and for some reason, jealousy’s right on top of the list. Wait until you can calmly handle your girlfriend/boyfriend’s other relationships before you try to advance yours.
5. They Don’t Like Your Cat
You think I’m joking. Not joking.
6. You Go To Bed Angry
No matter how close you are with your significant other, you will eventually argue, and you will eventually fight. It’s just how it is – love’s a strong emotion, and even the calmest couples occasionally end up in each other’s faces.
When you do, you’d better find some way to make up, and quick. Nothing hurts a relationship quite like angry silence. It may be the biggest gut check of all before you take the next step.
Ask yourself: what matters more? My relationship or my pride? If you’re leaning toward the latter, it’s not time.
Another one to watch out for is jealousy. If your other half is jealous that you’re spending time with a co-worker or old friend instead of them. This usually stems from insecurities, but can be a big sign they’re not ready for a real relationship.