Linda is a stay at home mom. That is not unique in any way as there are millions of women like her for whom the home is where they spend most of their day.
What makes Linda different is this, she is a highly trained management consultant. She used to lead a staff of bright young men and women and her services were well sought after. Then she got married and decided to be a stay at home mom.
I have heard several couples prior to marriage outline their plans for their perfect family. They would get married; the women would quickly give birth to the agreed number of kids. Then stay at home to take care of the kids until they are independent enough to be left alone
Then she would go out and start working. That sounds like a good plan. If only it were that simple. Because life never ever works out the way we think especially when it comes to making decisions that involve other people.
Why women choose to be stay at home moms
Women like Linda always have a strange kind of fascination for me. People like me can’t wrap it around our heads that someone could give up so much to be a stay at home mom.
Some of the reason women choose that path include
1. It gives the women enough time to care properly for the family. That is, both the husband and children.
2. Women understand that babies are babies just once. Women choose to stay at home because they don’t want to miss those moments. They want to witness every important moment of the baby’s life.
For instance, they would want to be the first to hear the baby’s first words. Hopefully, it would be ‘mama’.
3. There just isn’t enough time in the day to split between taking care of the home and going to a full-time job.
4. Being a stay at home mom could be economical for the family especially if the woman’s job is not a high-paying one. So spending money on things like transport fare, lunch break and paying for a nanny could be saved instead.
5. It could be less stressful as the ladies won’t have to combine the stress of everyday life outside (at work) and inside the home.
6. A stay at home mom gets enough time to mold the kids the way she desires.
Cons of being a stay at home mom
There are other peculiar reasons to be a stay at home mom. Sometimes it depends on the lady and the circumstances. On the flip side of the coin, it is not all rosy for stay at home mom in some cases
Some of the problems associated with stay at home mom includes
1. It is an unappreciated job. Nobody pays the women to do it. Even the hubby can sometimes take the work they do in keeping the home running smoothly for granted.
2. Life could be passing the women by as other people are living it up daily
3. Her education and training are wasted. The skill that meant a lot to many people is now redundant
4. Chances are high that you would be overcome with boredom. It is just a short step from boredom to doing silly things to fill up that empty space in your day
5. Taking care of the kids, the house and a husband could be stressful. The job can drain the energy out of the woman, leading to complications in health if one is not too careful.
6. Your peers who are professionals would constantly look down on you. The respect you once had would be lost.
Men’s attitude to stay at home mom
Just like one can never predict life, it is the same way one can never say for sure how different men react to the idea of a stay at home mom.
Patrick, for instance, is thinking seriously about divorcing his wife. He doesn’t like the fact that she prefers to stay at home and depend on him completely. He has tried to talk her into getting a job or start a business.
But she keeps coming up with excuses not to do anything. Her trump card is to get pregnant thereby putting all other plans on hold until the coming baby is old enough to be left alone.
On the other hand, many men deliberately go out to look for ladies who are jobless to marry. According to this line thought, as long as they are at home, they won’t be open to temptations from other men. Silly right?
The modern world and stay at home mom
Women have come a long way in their struggles to be treated equally as men. The strides in education and the workplace are impressive.
It is common to see mothers of children comfortably shuffling her important day job with taking care of the home. That is a testament to how strong women are naturally.
So if some women can do it, why not the others?
Men should play a huge role here. With complete support from the men, like perhaps helping out in some house chores, women would find it easier to combine both roles.
Seriously, a lot of important manpower is lost when women stay at home. Granted, taking care of kids is important. But it hardly improves the economy of a nation because it is an unpaid job.
In the final analysis, these are personal decisions. However, it is best not to waste the talents of our women by keeping them at home.
So, what do you think? Would you prefer your wife to be a stay at home mom? And ladies, let’s have you take on this issue too.