Why You Should Save Yourself from a Borderline Partner
Have you ever considered the possibility that your loved one maybe having a serious mental disorder?
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It could be that you are having a lot of fights and constant battles and still thinking that it could be your fault, and maybe you are constantly feeling guilty because he or she is one who is always getting hurt and crying in pain. Have you ever considered the possibility that the pain and suffering that your partner is going through maybe not because of you but because they are abnormal?
You partner maybe constantly claiming how much he or she is hurt by what others have done to her and how she is constantly put down by other people and how much she is getting hurt. You and your empathies and sympathies may have maximized to a level where you are not seeing anything more than the hurt world you partner has created for you.
You have genuinely open your whole heart to that person and your conscience is nothing but a minefield that your partner can easily walk on and every time your partner decides to tread so freely on it blaming your for their hurt, you feel like your inside keeps blowing up and you are getting more and more damaged. Very soon you would start to feel that you are losing the grip and the confidence you have in life.
With constant emotional outbursts and constant mood swings you would constantly find yourself getting pulled and pushed until one day you would find yourself gone insane. An individual with borderline disorder is to be sympathized but this is not to be misunderstood with getting close to them, because the closer you try to get to a borderline person, the more you become a victim of their inner instability.
One of the major features of the borderline disorder is called ambivalence, which means black and white vision. At one moment they may be seeing a person as an angel and the next moment they could be seeing the same person as a devil. They can love at one moment from the bottom of their hearts and the next moment they can hate like hell from the bottom of their hearts.
With their intelligence and learnt behaviour they act a lot of things in life but the truth is they do not have enough space to worry about you because their hearts are already filled with pain about themselves. They consider themselves to be really mature and think that their hurt is completely the fault of their partner. They may even say that they are just and honest and not liars like you and justify their actions to the maximum.
The danger here is that, you won’t be able to discern this type of personality until you get really close. Their mind operates on two things called idealization and devaluation. One moment they would be treating you as the hero who came to rescue their lives but the as they begin to see a fault in you, instead of dealing with it out of love like a normal person, they would devaluate you and see everything in black and start hating you. That’s why this is called black and white view.
Lana Joseph a freelance writer and social reformer where she writes about things that inspires or gets notified in the society. She has been writing about current hot topics such as valentine day, travelling tips, Private detective and food trends and many more.